Saturday, November 27, 2010
It's time for a new president
WE THE PEOPLE are lazy. I'm sorry, I love all of you tea partiers who made the dream of ousting Wiccan Pelosi a reality, but where in the Lord's name are you today?! I'm happy that you're shopping and eating because that expands our free privatized market$, but WHERE IN GOD'S NAME ARE YOU?
Do y'all know what I mean? As I said earlier, WE THE PEOPLE took back the House, but we failed in the Senate and we failed in removing Hussein Obama from office. OK, so let's not sit on our rightfully fat conservative duffs! Let's get onto these here computers, phones, faxes, bullhorns and shout it out that we have a lot of work to do!
Now is the time to get a solid Republican candidate out there. I love you Miss Sarah, Governor Romney, Vice President Cheney, Governor Huckabee, but where are you? Y'all can enter the race anytime you want, but I'm calling on the Honorable Herman Cain to jump into the 2012 presidential race RIGHT NOW! Whenever I'm in the truck, I try to get Mr. Cain on the radio or find anything I can on this computer. Who is this man and why should he be running? As you can tell from the picture up top, this is a fine African-American man who just happens to be a solid conservative who is as close to one of my other favorite presidential candidates of all time: Dr. Alan Keyes. My best friend Roosevelt - another fine conservative God-fearing African-American male - talked about this idea until 3 a.m. and we are now going to start the movement to DRAFT HERMAN FOR PRESIDENT!
Every night on his talk show, Herman talks common sense conservative values that at least 95% of Real Americans agree with. This man made a fortune with Godfather's Pizza and I know that this great man can make it into the White House and do the same with America! But no one knows Herman Cain, Bill! SHUT UP AND LISTEN TO ME AND ROOSEVELT! Just follow our lead and you will see a major transformation in history. Herman Cain can easily tear Hussein Obama to pieces in any debate. Herman Cain will easily dismantle illegal health care! Herman Cain will create jobs and kick the environmental job-destroyers out of the country! Herman Cain will stare down evildoers wherever they exist! Herman Cain is a man, patriot and defender of freedom for all who wish to protect freedom.
For far too long, anti-Americans have been calling the shots and are now confiscating our hard-earned dollar$! NOW IS THE TIME FOR HERMAN CAIN! DRAFT HERMAN NOW!